December Dilemma Survey Finds that Interfaith Families Serve as Role Models for Tolerance During Hanukkah and Christmas Celebrations. Instead of Angst, Interfaith Families are Finding Acceptance and Peace

After a bitter and polarizing presidential campaign, in which faith was perceived by many to have played an important role, a new survey indicates that the countrys one million interfaith families may be able to help heal the rift caused by the presidential campaign by serving as role models for tolerance. Although the December holidays have long been considered a difficult time for interfaith relationships, a new trend is emerging in which families are experiencing acceptance and peace in their holiday observances, according to the December Dilemma Survey, released today by InterfaithFamily.com (www.interfaithfamily.com), an independent non-profit publisher and advocacy membership association.

(PRWEB) November 15, 2004 -- These findings are significant because they dispel the common perception that interfaith families find the December holidays to be especially difficult. Typically interfaith families are thought to be beset with questions about identity as well as conflicting emotions resulting from the challenges of negotiating religious observance, holiday symbols and celebrations, family dynamics and pressures to celebrate either or both Christmas and Hanukkah. Conversely, the survey found that a majority of the respondents look forward to the December holidays eagerly; in contrast, only 16 percent said the did not look forward to the holidays very much

"The survey indicates that people in interfaith couples tend to be very tolerant and respectful of each partners religious traditions and observances, especially as it relates to their extended family and friends. There still can be tensions and misunderstandings between family members who practice one religion and extended family who practice another, but the number who indicated those feelings were in the minority," said Edmund Case, publisher, InterfaithFamily.com. "During the election, Americans showed the importance they place on religious issues and morals, but at the same time, appreciation and respect for other peoples faith and values are critical during these polarizing times. Interfaith families could serve as role models for living in a multicultural country."

The December Dilemma Survey, which fielded responses from 199 people nationwide in October, was designed to understand how interfaith families celebrate their own and their partners holidays and to gain insight into those celebrations. Interestingly, despite the holidays close proximity in 2003 (with the eight-day holiday of Hanukkah starting December 20, 2003), more than two-thirds of respondents said they kept their celebrations separate as opposed to blending them.

Holiday Observances

Of the respondents who said they had children, 80 percent said their children were raised as Jews. Of the 81 percent of interfaith families who responded that they celebrate both holidays, 82 percent said they enjoy Hanukkah very much and 53 percent said they enjoy Christmas very much. Meanwhile, of the non-Jewish relatives responding to the survey who attended a Hanukkah celebration last year, 85 percent felt more comfortable than comfortable.

The most common ways of celebrating Hanukkah in the families own homes included: lighting a menorah (99 percent), gift giving (90 percent), eating Hanukkah foods (78 percent) and telling the Hanukkah story (55 percent). The most common ways of celebrating Christmas in their own homes included: gift giving (67 percent), tree decorating (53 percent), hanging stockings (37 percent) and other Christmas decorations (40 percent), singing Christmas songs (41) and eating Christmas foods (33 percent).

Other Findings

The survey indicated that interfaith families felt comfortable reconciling their participation in Hanukkah and Christmas observances.

It found:

- Children play a critical role during the December holidays. Interfaith families with children feel it important to celebrate the holidays of both sets of grandparents, even if the grandchildren are being raised in one religion.

- Many respondents wrote that rather than weakening their or their childrens religious identity, celebrating Christmas, for example, actually strengthened Jewish religious identity.

- A primary way the interfaith couples raising Jewish children resolve potential conflicts is to treat Hanukkah but not Christmas as a religious holiday. Nearly two-thirds of respondents reported that their Hanukkah celebrations were more religious than secular; in contrast, three-quarters reported that their Christmas celebrations were more secular than religious.

- Traditionally the Christmas tree has been considered by Jews to be a very potent symbol of the Christmas holiday, and while there is still residual discomfort with it on the part of one quarter of intermarried Jews, the Survey indicates significant comfort too. Nearly 53 percent of intermarried Jews in the survey reported they had Christmas trees in their homes. Of them, 26 percent felt more uncomfortable than comfortable while 41 percent felt more comfortable than uncomfortable with the tree.

- For interfaith parents raising their children as Jews, 86 percent do not tell non-Jewish relatives not to give Christmas presents to their children. According to one respondent, "We see no reason to stop our kids from receiving presents from the non-Jewish relatives, and we give our non-Jewish relatives presents at Christmas because its when the gesture is most meaningful to them."

About InterfaithFamily.com

InterfaithFamily.com (www.interfaithfamily.com) is an independent non-profit publisher and advocacy membership association that works to encourage Jewish choices by interfaith families and increase acceptance of interfaith families by the Jewish community. InterfaithFamily.com publishes a bi-weekly Web magazine that reaches out directly to interfaith families, delivering helpful, non-judgmental information about how to handle various situations that arise for interfaith families. InterfaithFamily.com also produced the first-of-its-kind anthology, The Guide to Jewish Interfaith Family Life: An InterfaithFamily.com Handbook (Jewish Lights Publishing), to offer much-needed support for interfaith families seeking to explore Jewish life. InterfaithFamily.com is the only national organization that focuses exclusively on reaching out to and helping interfaith families themselves, and advocating on a grass-roots level as their "voice."

EDITORS NOTE: InterfaithFamily.com has developed "Handling the December Holidays: Eight Tips from InterfaithFamily.com" that is designed to help interfaith families have a more enjoyable and meaningful holiday season. If you are interested in receiving a copy of "Handling the December Holidays," please send an email to 8tips@birnbachcom.com.

# # #