Infidelity Expert Reveals The Truth About Cyber Affairs

Are cyber affairs considered infidelity? Should a cyber affair be taken seriously? What are the signs of a cyber affair? Infidelity expert Ruth Houston answers these and other questions about cyber affairs and internet infidelity.

(PRWEB) May 4, 2006 -- “Cyber affairs are the ‘flavor of the day’ when it comes to infidelity and extramarital affairs.” says infidelity expert Ruth Houston. “The internet now ties with the workplace as the leading place for cheaters to find willing partners with whom to have extramarital affairs.”

Houston, the founder of InfidelityAdvice.com and author of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs was recently quoted in an article in the Staten Island Advance entitled “Cyber Cheating, an Emotional Affair.”

As an experiment, reporter Melissa Anelli placed a personal ad in CraigsList.org, purporting to be a single woman looking for a married man in or near Staten Island, New York. She received close to 200 replies the first day the ad appeared.

“This is a clear example of how easy the internet has made it for a person to cheat on their mate.” says Houston. “With a few clicks of the mouse, a potential cheater has instant access to an endless array of willing partners.”

Expanding on her comments in the Staten Island Advance article, Houston observes, “Gone are the days when a would-be-cheater had to physically leave home to seek out someone with whom to have an affair. Now it can all be done in cyberspace without the risk of running into family members, nosy neighbors, or inquisitive friends and workmates.”

“A cyber affair can be initiated and cultivated from the privacy of your home.” says Houston. “Your unsuspecting spouse or significant other could even be present in the same room, totally oblivious to what is taking place.”

Is a Cyber Affair Cheating?

“Cyber cheating is a form of emotional infidelity.” explains Houston. “And most emotional infidelity eventually leads to sexual infidelity.” However, Houston warns that men and women view cyber affairs very differently.

“Since, in the early stages there’s no sex involved, men don’t really consider a cyber affair to be infidelity. But women view it quite differently. A Divorce Magazine survey found that 46 percent of men considered an internet relationship to be infidelity, compared to 72 percent of women.” Houston says her personal research confirms these findings.

How Serious are Cyber Affairs?

People often ask Ruth Houston how seriously they should take a cyber affair if there’s no sex involved. Houston’s advice, based on 11 years of research and interviews with thousands of infidelity victims is this “Consider a cyber affair as a very serious threat to your marriage or relationship.”

“In the past 10 years, divorce attorneys have reported seeing an increase in divorces and separations resulting from cyber infidelity. According to the Fortino Group, one-third of divorce litigation is caused by online affairs. So don’t underestimate the seriousness of the situation.”

“It doesn’t take much for a cyber affair to make the transition from cyberspace to the real world.” Houston explains. Studies have found close connections between cyber affairs and subsequent sexual affairs.

According to statistics, 50% of people who engage in internet chats have made phone contact with someone they chatted with online.

One study found that 30 % of cyber-affairs escalate from e-mail to telephone calls to personal contact.

Another study found that 31% of people had an online conversation which eventually led to real-time sex.

Cyber affairs are very serious, indeed!

Signs of a Cyber Affair

How can you tell if youor partner is having a cyber affair? Telltale signs of a cyber affair include sitting at the computer into the wee hours of the night, heading for the computer first thing in the morning, insisting on privacy when surfing the Net, moving the computer into a private area of the home or a locked office, constantly changing passwords, and other suspicious behavior.

Chapter 23, Computer Use, in Houston’s book, Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs, lists 30 computer-related telltale signs that can alert you that your partner may be involved in a cyber affair. (Order your copy from www.InfideltyAdvice.com. Amazon.com. or 1-800-431-1579)

Houston says, “No matter what term you use -- cyber cheating, cyber affairs, online affairs or internet affairs, this is a variation of emotional infidelity and should never be taken lightly.” Those who have questions about whether their partner’s online friendship constitutes emotional infidelity can request Ruth Houston’s free Emotional Infidelity Quiz by sending an email to InfidelityInfo@gmail.com ( InfidelityInfo at gmail.com) with the words “Emotional Infidelity Quiz” in the subject line.

A Foolproof Test

“People usually attempt to justify cyber affairs by calling them harmless online friendships.” says Houston “If your partner tries to make light of your concern, or accuses you of making a big deal about nothing, there’s one way to find out for sure.”

“If the internet relationship is the harmless, innocent friendship your partner claims it to be, then he should have no problem with you sitting beside him and observing the exchange of correspondence back and forth. If your partner is unwilling to do that, then you have your answer as to whether or not the friendship is as harmless as they would have you believe. Take heed and govern yourself accordingly.”

About Ruth Houston:

Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the author of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs, which documents practically every known sign of infidelity. Ruth is frequently called on by the media to comment on popular infidelity issues and infidelity-related breaking news. She has been quoted in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Cosmopolitan, First for Women, Complete Woman, the New York Post, the Chicago Tribune, the Toronto Sun, the Houston Chronicle, New York Newsday, the Christian Science Monitor, Crain’s New York Business, City Life, MSN Lifestyle, iVillage, Netscape, Newhouse News Service, United Press International, Reuters, Entertainment Online, Hollywood Heat and numerous other print and online media.

She has been a guest on The Today Show, Good Day New York, Telemundo, 1010WINS, TalkAmerica, BBC, CBC, and over 250 other radio and TV talk shows in the United States, Canada, Europe, South America, New Zealand, and the Caribbean.

For more information on infidelity visit http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com

To interview infidelity expert Ruth Houston, call 718 592-6039 or e-mail (InfidelityExpert at gmail.com)

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