TIPS FOR MANAGING HOLIDAY MADNESS

Stress Management Trainer Simma Lieberman provides ten proven techniques for reducing holiday stress.

While the holiday season can be joyous, fun, and exciting, many people equate it with stress, chaos, and expense in terms of time and money. Stress and life/work balance specialist Simma Lieberman explains ten ways to reduce stress during the holidays.

Change holiday madness into a season of serenity with the following tips:

1. GET GIFT-EFFICIENT. Make a list of everyone you need to buy gifts for. Then, buy everyone gifts from the same stores (e.g. bath and body lotions, candles, books), shop on the Web from one mall site, or buy everyone magazine subscriptions. Get a couple of extra gifts with blank cards so you won't be embarrassed if someone you forgot or don't like buys you a gift.

2. REFUSE INVITATIONS. You dont have to go to every event you are invited to. It's okay to refuse invitations, particularly from friends and family who create stressful environments for you. Forcing yourself to spend time with them will only interfere with your serenity. The holiday season is only once a year, so dont waste it on events and activities that will make you miserable.

3. RELISH IN TRADITIONS. Relish the traditions you have created for yourself or your family during the holidays. If you find traditions lacking, create new ones. Do you have foods, music, events, activities, and rituals that you enjoy during this time of the year? Build one into every day so that you have something to look forward to. Play a favorite holiday song while brushing your teeth and getting ready for work. If you cant cook a dish that your mother used to make during the holidays, go out and find a restaurant or friend who can.

4. AVOID SHOPPING RAGE. Your parking spot gets stolen, you pick the slowest checkout line, and you cant find decent help. You can either find the humor in the situation or simmer in stress and frustration. Unless you have the power to change the situation, frustration will only create more negative energy. Gain perspective by projecting forward a week and determining how much this frustration will matter. Find a way to chuckle about the realities of shopping during the holidays, and move on.

5. BREATHE. Practice conscious breathing exercises ten minutes a day. This will keep you calm and relaxed through the end of the year as you face stressful situations. Any time you feel overwhelmed or stressed, taking a few deep breaths will help you separate mentally and emotionally from the stresses. This is particularly helpful when dealing with demanding relatives, friends, or coworkers who want you to come to their house or --worse! -- come to yours.

6. LEARN TO LET GO. Remember you can't control the behavior and attitudes of those people around you. You can't control their drinking, smoking, eating or inappropriate remarks. Its not your fault if your first cousin loudly insults the rest of the family or if a friend makes the wrong comment at the wrong time. Remember your deep breathing exercises.

7. DON'T COMPARE. When you talk to friends and family at get-togethers, make a concerted effort not to start comparing yourself to others, no matter how great their clothes, lifestyles, appearance, or jobs seem to be. Don't knock down your spirits with comparisons like these and push these thoughts out of your head if you find yourself starting to make them.

8. SCHEDULE TIME TO BE ALONE. When you consciously plan to have alone time, it keeps you empowered and reduces possible feelings of melancholy during the holiday season. You will also be also be less overwhelmed by external stimuli. Besides, when you begin to feel good about being alone, everyone will call and e-mail you to make demands on your time.

9. AVOID THE NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION SET-UP. Resolutions should not be focused solely on fixing" yourself. Your number one resolution should be to continue to do the things that make you happy. Think about the people and activities you enjoy and commit yourself to spending more time with these people and activities and less time with people and projects that add stress to your life.

10. SHOW YOU CARE. Finally, take some time to think about the people you love and care about. Give them the gift of a phone call or note just to let them know how important they are to you during the holidays. Most people need this type of nourishment in general and may need it even more during the holidays.

Simma Lieberman works with organizations to create environments where people can do their best work and enjoy their life. She specializes in diversity, gender communication, and life/work balance and stress. Simma is nationally known as a dynamic and humorous speaker, trainer, consultant and author. She was recently featured in Working Mother magazine and the Managing Workplace Conflict Journal.

To publish Simma's tips on reducing stress, please contact Kate Berardo at kate@simmalieberman.com.