Insensitive Guys Come Clean: 10 Things Women Must Know

(PRWEB) November 29, 2004

Ask almost any single woman anywhere in the world and they’ll tell you there’s no shortage of insensitive men. Author Charles Harry reveals why there are so many—and how you can avoid a bad relationship by learning ten truths all guys keep secret.

“All men are inherently insensitive whether they know it or not,” says Harry. “Men are not just physically opposite from women; we are emotionally and temperamentally opposite as well. It’s why there are so many problems and misunderstandings. It’s also why we can never be apart.”

In his new book ‘Confessing with girls: money, lies, sex, and insensitive men’ (Bertram & Knott, May 2005), Harry entertainingly presents little-known truths that women can use to better understand how men work on an emotional level. He offers ten facts you ignore at your own risk:

10 - An insensitive man will seem confident, secure and honest because he's not trying to impress you. He could care less about you. Only those men who are awkward, reserved or shy truly care for you. Problem is women are attracted to the former not the latter.

9 - The great catches are those who have learned to suppress naturally callous behavior. It’s definitely a skill that must be learned by men. The right woman will be a good motivator. But as time goes on, the struggle will become more difficult.

8 – Understand that you can influence a person’s behavior temporarily, but you can’t change a person’s nature. Think of it this way: to hope a man becomes more sensitive to your feelings is like hoping a wild animal will not attack prey. There’s a chance but the odds are slim.

7 - Women like the thrill of the chase. Men want to get to the point immediately. Insensitive men you’re involved with won't care about the point or the chase—they are getting both elsewhere.

6 – Men generally avoid admitting this to a woman but believe it: insensitive men fall in love with female body parts first: the woman later. Sometimes much later and by then too much water has passed under the bridge and you end up splitting.

5 – Another point most men hate to admit to themselves: you are either the one an insensitive man wants to marry, or the one he wants to sleep with. You are not both. This is especially true as time goes on.

4 – Insensitive men look for subtle things in the relationship that are unpleasant. They use these trials or tribulations to justify leaving. You are left wondering what went wrong because rarely will he tell you the exact reason. This also works in reverse where the woman leaves and the man is left wondering.

3 – Insensitive men will never admit they are chauvinists born out of fear. It’s because they are continually threatened by the modern realization that women—an animal he doesn’t understand or relate to—have always had control over men.

2 – Insensitive men will only see the big picture and rarely notice details; you’ve changed your hair; you’ve bought new earrings. If it doesn’t affect him or your relationship directly, he doesn’t care.

1 - Unlike women, men are excruciatingly simple to understand. Three primal needs make up the male fabric only one of which is bolstered with a compulsion to love. Shelter, survival, and sex. Sex is the need that is coupled with love. For men, love is the fly in the ointment. The understanding comes when you realize that for men, love is foreign. For women, love is native.

When we start to understand how the male thought process actually works—for better or for worse—women can begin to understand men on a level that can actually help improve a relationship. And, hopefully, avoid a bad one. ‘Confessing with girls: money, lies, sex, and insensitive men’ by Charles Harry will be published by Bertram & Knott and be available in bookstores nationwide May 2005.

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