An Office Romance Can Be Detrimental to Your Career

Proceed with caution if youre tempted to have an office romance" says infidelity expert Ruth Houston, who was recently quoted in a Christian Science Monitor article on workplace romance and office affairs.

(PRWEB) February 22, 2005 -- Proceed with caution if youre contemplating having an office affair or workplace romance" says infidelity expert Ruth Houston, who was recently quoted in a Christian Science Monitor article on office romance.

Experts say that over 70% of single employees will become romantically involved with someone on the job at some point in their career. Research shows that people are more likely to date a coworker than anyone else. Todays workplace has becomes the new singles bar." The workplace has also become the #1 place for married men and women to meet affair partners and conduct extramarital affairs.

As tempting as it may be to date someone from work, the risks far outweigh the rewards" says Ruth Houston, infidelity expert and author of Is He Cheating on You?" Houston was recently quoted in a article in the business section of the Christian Science Monitor entitled To Date, or Not to Date by Randy Dotinga. Further expanding on her comments in that article, Houston discusses some of the negative aspects of office affairs.

Legal Complications
An office romance can cause you legal problems as well as public embarrassment" points out Houston. Especially if your .workplace lover becomes involved in a corporate scandal. You could be named as an accomplice, or hauled into court as a government witness," says Houston, citing the examples below:

•   U.S. District Judge Barbara Jones, the judge in the trial of ex-WorldCom chief executive Bernard J. Ebbers, ruled that star witness Scott Sullivan can be questioned about his marital infidelity because it speaks to his character for truthfulness.

•   Book publisher Judith Regan may be forced to testify about her affair with Bernard Kerik who withdrew his name from Homeland Security nominee in the midst of numerous allegations of personal and professional improprieties.

•   Testimony from three former mistresses helped put Nathan Chapman away for 7 ½ years for defrauding Maryland's state pension fund system and looting his three publicly traded companies.

These are only three of the most recent examples of how an romance may become public knowledge, much to the embarrassment of those involved. In addition, males in supervisory positions who have office affairs with female subordinate run the risk of becoming the subject of a sexual-harassment suit if the woman later claims to have been coerced or pressured into the relationship for fear of her job. For that reason many companies now forbid romance between bosses and subordinates. Others companies require persons involved to sign consensual relationship agreements -- also known as love contracts" - which state that the relationship is voluntary.

Career Complications
"Aside from legal issues, workers tempted to date their bosses should worry about whether a relationship will hurt their careers", said Houston in the Christian Science Monitor article.

"If it ends badly and you were involved with someone in your direct chain of command, very nasty things can happen," Houston says, especially if your boss is married. "No matter how hard you work, some of your co-workers will always be convinced you got your raise or your promotion as a reward for sexual favors, rather than that you worked hard and earned it."
Below, Houston further expands on some of the day-to-day and long-range career complications that can result:

•   Envious co-workers may become jealous and attempt to sabotage your work.
•   Your productivity or the productivity of those around you may suffer.
•   You could become the subject of office gossip
•   If your office affair results in preferential treatment with regard to work assignments, raises, promotions or company perks your co-workers will resentment you.
•   A series of office romances will earn you a reputation as someone who tries to sleep their way to the top.
•   You may be transferred to another department or even required to leave the company, especially if you are a woman. When an office affair becomes a problem, its usually the woman who is penalized.
•   It could create an awkward situation when the romance ends, and the two of you still have to work together.
•   If you end the relationship and the other person is vindictive, they can sabotage your career in ways you cant even begin to imagine.
•   A disgruntled lover can negatively influence the kind of work assignments, raises, and opportunities for advancement you receive.
•   Your coworkers assessment of you perceptions of your performance may be lowered.
•   No matter how good you are, there will always be speculation as to the real" reason for your job advancement.

How to Keep Your Office Romance on a Professional Level
My advice regarding office romance and workplace affairs is to avoid them, if at all possible, since the risks greatly outweigh the rewards," says Ruth Houston. If youre currently involved in a workplace romance, or youre tempted to become involved in one despite my warnings, the guidelines below will help you keep things on a professional level."

•   Know your companys policy regarding office romance.
•   Never get involved with someone in your direct chain of command.
•   Confine your romantic attachments to someone who is a peer, rather than someone above or below you in rank.
•   Never get involved with in a workplace affair if you or the other person is married.
•   Never underestimate the power of the office grapevine. Try to keep your office romance a secret, if you can.
•   Keep it low key -- dont flaunt the fact that the two of you are romantically involved.
•   Avoid public displays of affection -- its highly unprofessional.
•   Dont gossip about your love life.
•   Do not exchange embarrassing or ostentatious flowers, cards or gifts. (Small , discreet, tasteful gifts are okay.)
•   Do not allow your workplace romance to interfere with productivity -- yours, your partners or your coworkers.
•   Do not use company e-mail to send passionate or suggestive love notes to each other.
•   Do not leave X-rated voice mails on each others phones.
•   Dont show or request favoritism regarding work assignments, raises, promotions or company perks.
•   Do not use company funds to entertain your partner.
•   Refrain from overt sexual behavior on the job.
•   Never engage in sex on company property. (That includes stair wells, supply closets and company parking lots.)
•   Have a back-up career plan in case things take a negative turn. Be prepared to find another job.

About Ruth Houston:
Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the author of Is He Cheating on You?- 829 Telltale Signs, a comprehensive guide which documents practically every known sign of infidelity. She has been quoted in the New York Times, the Toronto Sun, the New York Post, Cosmopolitan, the Christian Science Monitor, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, Marie Claire and numerous other publications here and abroad. She has also been a guest on over 100 radio and TV talk shows in the US, Europe, South America, and the Caribbean, including Good Day New York, TalkAmerica, Telemundo, BBC, The Breakfast Club, Caracol Radio Network, ClearChannel, the Mike Gallagher Show, and 1010WINS.

To interview Ruth Houston, please call her at 718 592-6039 or email her at InfidelityExpert@gmail.com For more information on infidelity, visit http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com

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