New York City, NY (PRWEB) November 14, 2005
“Are you doomed to a miserable holiday if your relatives drive you crazy? Even if your family relationship is a battlefield, you can turn Thanksgiving into one of the best holidays you’ve ever had. Simply follow the seven key steps of my ‘holiday emergency’ family relationship advice!” says Dr. Diana Kirschner, one of the nation’s leading authorities on love and family relationship advice and author of the smash hit book, Opening Love’s Door, a fable with secrets for creating love & happy relationships in your life.
Here are the seven steps of Dr. Kirschner’s family relationship advice:
1. Shock your troublesome ‘bad egg’ relatives into being cordial or even likeable. List three things, even small things, like hair color or crossword puzzle ability, you truly appreciate about them. Work these things into your conversation in an authentic way at the beginning of the family visit. This will tend to shock these ‘bad eggs’ into being ‘good eggs.’
2. Use the therapist’s secret. When you’re facing a battleaxe relative, win by refusing to fight. Accept comments that used to upset you with a nod and say “That’s the way you see it.” This really throws them and saves you from a lot of holiday stress.
3. Neutralize joy-kill fighting among your kids. Get all of your kids, even your youngest, into helping to prepare for the holiday. Have them set the table, decorate, slice and dice. This key piece of family relationship advice will engage the children’s attention, give them something to be proud of and stop any fighting.
4. Set your intention for this holiday. You can make up your mind to have a happy Thanksgiving, no matter what your family relationships are like. Decide something like, “This is the happiest Thanksgiving I’ve ever had.” Remember to use the present tense. Instead of engaging in family relationship battles, as soon as it’s possible, give yourself your own fun—excuse yourself and go out for a walk or jump in a pile of leaves.
5. Stop worrying about looking good. Say you’re having your in-laws over for dinner and you’re nervous. Realize that it’s not about having a house that is perfect: it’s about what it feels like when people come into your house. If you’re all-consumed with the decorations, table setting and the food being perfect, you’ll end up exhausted, miserable, or fighting with your kids and husband. Your real job is to create celebration, fun and joy
6. Create a tradition of personal sharing & gratitude. Ask each family member to talk about favorite memories of the holiday around the dinner table. Have them share what they are most thankful for on thanksgiving. Research shows that the happiest people are the ones who are grateful for what they have.
7. Set up a postive bond when a new boy/girlfriend comes to Thanksgiving dinner.
Beforehand, tell both the family and your friend all the “good news” about each other. Introduce discussion topics both have interest in. If you are the newbie in the family, bring an incredibly thoughtful gift for the occasion, ask questions and listen a lot. Appreciate any and all good things about the meal, the house and the family members and remember to tell them what you enjoyed!
Dr. Diana Kirschner has presented her love and family relationship advice on Oprah, Good Morning America, Sally Jessy Raphael, and numerous radio shows. She has been interviewed by The New York Times, Time Magazine, The New York Post, the LA Times, USA Today and many more radio & TV talk shows, newspapers and magazines.
Contact Dr.Diana Kirschner