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NewsLaugh Exclusive! Uncle Sam's Shaky Transition To Empire; Having The Right Strategy Should Would Help

In this week’s free issue, NewsLaugh.com, The Sanely Funny Weekly Humor Magazine, reports that, uncomfortable as we may be with the inadvertence, we have entered the age of The American Empire. We didn’t ask for it, but here it is, like an overgrown eagle that decided, surprisingly enough, to flap into our laps. The problem is, we don’t have a clue how to take hold of that confused bird and send it off on a long and majestic flight. Right now what we’ve usually got are most of the right intentions but all of the wrong results. Why?

New York, NY (PRWEB) July 31, 2006 -- In this week’s free issue, NewsLaugh.com, The Sanely Funny Weekly Humor Magazine, reports that, uncomfortable as we may be with the inadvertence, we have entered the age of The American Empire. We didn’t ask for it, but here it is, like an overgrown eagle that decided, surprisingly enough, to flap into our laps.

The problem is, we don’t have a clue how to take hold of that confused bird and send it off on a long and majestic flight. Right now what we’ve usually got are most of the right intentions but all of the wrong results. Why?

We have opted for a strategy that's based on what we’re just no good at and what, historically, has foiled sustainable empire -- that is, we all too often attempt military solutions.

Do we even like military solutions? No. In fact, unlike empires that sought world dominion ruthlessly, we’re uneasy about conquest, not to mention killing. It goes against our childlike but redemptive faith in freedom and democracy.

What are we good at? Economic solutions. And do we like them? You bet. One of the few prescient things Cal Coolidge said is, “The business of America is business.”

And, coincidence of coincidences, what does most of the world want? War or economic success?

So here’s our strategy for the reluctant but successful conduct of the America Empire.

This humorous but pointed story is only one of the many ways readers can discover “Sanity Through Laughter” by going to NewsLaugh.com, created by humorist Tom Attea, which claims, “You can’t change the news but you can laugh at it.”

Other sanely funny features in this week’s free issue include:

 
  • Ten Things To Worry About And Ten Not To Worry About; Let’s Make A List

 
  • Muslim Women Prepare Undercover Rebellion; Use Internet To Order Bikinis

 
  • Prime Minister Of Iraq Visits Washington; Promises To Buy New Electric Shaver

 
  • New Books About Science And Religion: Same Old Arguments, So Here’s A New One

  • How President Garfield’s Died; Or Being Grateful For Modern Medicine, Despite The Cost

 
  • Floyd Landis Wins Tour De France With A Little Help From His Testicles

Readers can also laugh out loud at NewsLaugh's weekly fictional spoof. This week the magazine satirizes questionable answers to the thorny topics of birth control and the prevention of STDs with the extended spoof in which Dr. Coburn shows how you can "Just Say No To Sex." Students are encouraged to bolster their willpower with "Dr. Coburn’s One Hundred Axioms Of Abstinence." Previous installments are repeated after the latest installment for readers who may have missed one or more.

Readers may also subscribe to NewLaugh's free weekly newsletter for exclusive laughs and offers.

Each week, NewsLaugh.com presents humorous weekly articles under such headings as Sanely Funny Cover Story, Dreadline of the Week, Shreditorial, Washington Spin Din, Clever Monkey of the Week, and a Spoof of the Week.

About Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com:

Mr. Attea has had six shows produced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his comedy writing, “delightfully funny,” “witty,” with “great humor and ebullience" and "good, genuine laughs.”

He was awarded a grant as a playwright by New York’s Theater For The New City and co-wrote the first feature film Showtime produced.

He has extensive experience in news media. He wrote the recent campaign for The New York Sun, New York’s new broadsheet newspaper, “Illuminate Your World,” the classic campaign for Time Magazine, “There’s never been a greater need for understanding,” and the long-running theme for The Village Voice, “In this city, you need a Voice.” In broadcast media, he wrote the advertising that successfully introduced Lifetime television, “There’s nothing like a woman’s Lifetime,” and oversaw all the advertising for WABC TV and radio in New York.

The complete issue is available at www.newslaugh.com

For more information, email haha @ newslaugh.com

Tom Attea
Creator & Writer
Newslaugh.Com
Visit the Site
Telephone: 212-769-4545

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Uncle Sam's Shaky Transition To Empire: Having The Right Strategy Should Would Help
Uncomfortable as we may be with the inadvertence, we have entered the age of The American Empire. We didn’t ask for it, but here it is, like an overgrown eagle that decided, surprisingly enough, to flap into our laps. The problem is, we don’t have a clue how to take hold of that confused bird and send it off on a long and majestic flight. Right now what we’ve usually got are most of the right intentions but all of the wrong results. Why? We have opted for a strategy that's based on what we’re just no good at and what, historically, has foiled sustainable empire – that is, we all too often attempt military solutions. Do we even like military solutions? No. In fact, unlike empires that sought world dominion ruthlessly, we’re uneasy about conquest, not to mention killing. It goes against our childlike but redemptive faith in freedom and democracy. What are we good at? Economic solutions. And do we like them? You bet. One of the few prescient things Cal Coolidge said is, “The business of America is business.” And, coincidence of coincidences, what does most of the world want? War or economic success? So here’s our strategy for the reluctant but successful conduct of the America Empire. And Uncle Sam has to volunteer for the job. What other nation would you trust in the role?

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