How Do You Solve a Problem Like Donald Rumsfeld? Satirize Him

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Humor gets outfitted for a kamikaze combat mission with the release of “The Rumsfeld Diaries Political Action Pak.” Its goal? Give Americans the information and tools they need in as entertaining a way as possible so the tides of public opinion make their final shift, and U.S. Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld gets his “Political Liability” walking papers once and for all.

Donald Rumsfeld is about to discover two things that won’t make him very happy this week. The first is that some hack reporter stumbled upon his diaries and has released them to the public. The second is that these same diaries are the centerpiece of a guerrilla “Political Action Pak,” the goal of which is to get Rumsfeld fired from his post as U.S. Secretary of Defense once and for all.

Satire site editor Allen Voivod is the man behind a revealing “Creative Investigative Report” aptly called “The Rumsfeld Diaries,” available at Part truth, part fiction, all shocking, “Diaries” chronicles the torrid relationship between Rumsfeld and Saddam Hussein over the last 25 years. It also exposes the political machinations of the two Iraq wars, the personalities involved, and the conspiracy theorists trying to understand it all.

“It’s the ‘Spoonful of Sugar’ theory,” says Voivod, who’s been the editor of news and pop culture parody site since 2003. “Americans don’t want to read a bunch of boring court documents and analyses. But if we’re being entertained and the truth clocks us on the side of the head during a guffaw, we’ve been known to rally to action.”

“Diaries” weaves documented historical events, anecdotes, and quotes through the heart of one of the most common universal themes around: A tragic and unrequited love affair between two star-crossed lovers. But in what’s sure to inspire the most social and partisan controversy, this time the star-crossed lovers are none other than Rumsfeld and Hussein themselves.

As co-creator of the “Political Action Pak” – which features digital downloads for immediate access, including form letters to media and public servants, “Take Action” cheat sheets and check lists, and key resources for “news junkies, unconventional activists, law-abiding mavericks, and political satire fans” – Voivod is hoping his work will ultimately goad “Rummy” into early retirement. Voivod's also putting his money where his mouth is, by splitting 10% of all earnings from this first-of-its-kind multimedia kit between Amnesty International and Human Rights First.

“Tom ‘The Hammer’ Delay, I. ‘Scooter’ Libby, Mike ‘Hurricane Katrina’ Brown – all these guys lost their jobs because they either broke the law or met with the wrath of public disapproval,” explains Voivod. “Rummy has ‘allegedly’ authorized torture, violated the Geneva Convention, and made dire choices for most of his political career. Why is he still getting his text-messaging overages paid for by the tax payers?”

Voivod says he’s developing strategic partnerships that will get “Diaries” into the hands of people who appreciate good satire, want to ignite social change, will benefit from Rumsfeld’s resignation, or all three.

“Being a man of great integrity, my dream team includes other like-minded raconteurs like Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, Arianna Huffington, George Clooney, Al Franken, Air America, and The Onion,” says Voivod. “But I’d spend a week at Abu Ghraib for a windfall of financial backing from the ACLU and the Democratic National Committee.”

Voivod has already scored an exclusive interview with veteran news reporter and political humorist Hart Seely, author of the well-received “Pieces of Intelligence.” The book, a cunning work of satire on its own, features selected quotes and speeches by Rumsfeld in various poetic forms, such as Zen verse, sonnets, lyric poetry, and haiku.

Mr. Seely just returned from his second trip to Iraq in late July, and speaks to Voivod candidly about his perspective on the war, life as a writer, and the state of humor and satire in politics today. The interview is just one of the bonuses available to those who go to and support this uniquely packaged effort to overthrow the top dog of the greatest military power in the world.

About Epiphanies, Inc.

Possibly the only corporation ever born out of a love letter, Lani and Allen Voivod incorporated Epiphanies, Inc. in 2004 as a “creative content enterprise” specializing in brand-friendly, highly-targeted Web content for corporations and small businesses. In 2006, they've re-focused their energies to help budding entrepreneurs and small biz dynamos “A-Ha Themselves” by championing distinct voices and niche skill sets that can be used to catapult dreams and businesses. Learn more and sign up for their "Inciter" Ezine at!


Originally founded in Britain in July 2001 (at, the DeadBrain brand expanded to the U.S. with in August 2003. As "America's Least Reliable News Source," the sharp-witted parody site earned a record 21 Satire Awards in 2005, and its editor, Allen Voivod, was featured on NPR-affiliate WEVO in their half-hour interview show "The Front Porch" ( To read more about the DeadBrain story, go to

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