Voorhees, NJ (PRWEB) October 18, 2006
According to the National Center for Health Statistics, about 38% of the population is engaged in a divorce each year. Needless to say, divorce can create a numbing affect where you might feel like skipping the whole idea of the holidays to enjoy a tub of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream and the remote control. It can take its toll on your health….and existence.
With the holidays approaching, it becomes all the more important that we find ways to relieve stress and maintain a positive attitude. Shopping, meal planning, communicating with an ex-spouse, being alone, or financial struggles will increase the negative affects of stress during a divorce and studies have shown that mental health can be a strong influencer to our physical well being. This holiday season we must make a concentrated effort to be positive and we must do the things that optimists do so that we stay healthy. A Dutch study found that people who describe themselves as being highly optimistic had lower rates of cardiovascular death and were overall healthier people.
Gail Kasper, Motivational Strategist and author of the life strategy audio CD program Make a Decision to Win and co-author along with Stephen Covey and Brian Tracy of the book Mission Possible, will join the other 38% of the population going through divorce this holiday season. According to the Ohio State University College of Medicine, the effects of divorce have a strong physical affect on women attacking their immune system so that they are more susceptible to virus and infection. It has also been verified to be a source of cardiovascular disease. With men, a study conducted by the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health has shown that men who are divorced or separated endure a severe emotional strain and are 2 ½ times more likely to commit suicide than married men. She suggests these 6 steps to take control of life and claim peace of mind.
1. Rebuild Your Self Esteem. Whether the dumper or the dumpee, divorce will strain our self-esteem. There are 2 things we can do to impact our lives in a positive way. First, it’s time to remind ourselves of our strengths. What are they? Is it a hobby, our job, or our personality? Write them down and remind ourselves of them daily. Second, get out and have fun. I’m not saying to find a new mate, but have fun.
2. Ask for Help…And Enjoy It. Whether it’s advice, words of inspiration, or help with projects, avoid isolation and self-pity. Seek out those who love us and enlist their help and support. Call family and friends and clue them in on what has been going on.
3. Plan. If we don’t plan, we may find ourselves sitting in and staring at a wall. This will most certainly bring feelings of inadequacy and loss to the surface. It is so important during this time to stay busy and as soon as we feel those negative feelings, take action. Immediately, make a list of all the things we can do in that day to have a successful day.
4. Do What You Say You Will Do…..for your children as well as for yourself. When you do what you say you will do, you will not let your children down….and you will not let yourself down. You are holding yourself accountable. This same mentality will force you to go to a party or get out if you have promised that you would do so. If you’ve promised it, do it. No exceptions.
5. Take Responsibility. One way to get to happiness and contentment is through “yourself.” Come to terms with what happened in the marriage, our role, and what we can do different in future relationships. It takes 2 to tango and we all have responsibility on some level.
6. Be Fair. Rise above the situation. At this particular point, our future is much more important than our past and what we have been through. Any time or effort that we give to our past, will take away from our future. We may think that we will walk away with the entire house or all the cash, but what we’re really left with is a bitter, miserable, unhappy version of us that has demonstrated little, if any, values. Do the right thing and be fair to the ex. Why pay extra money to lawyers. Love got us into this, so let the love we once had get us through it.
7. Take the Process a Day at a Time. 90% of what we worry about never really happens so why give in to the unknown with worry and despair. Take the process one day at a time. Live in the moment and in appreciation because regardless of what someone may be trying to take from you, the greatest asset you have is yourself. Don’t anticipate, live in every minute. There is beauty that surrounds.
Professional Speaker Gail is the former Mrs. New Jersey America 2002, the current Mrs. Delaware Valley 2006, and has co-hosted the Emmy award-winning America’s TV JobNetwork (airing on CBS and Fox). She currently hosts The Visitor’s Channel and makes regular appearances on Comcast as well as network affiliates. Gail is the author of the time management and goal setting audio CD program "Make a Decision to Win" and co-author, along with Stephen Covey and Brian Tracy, of the book “Mission Possible II.” Coupling a business degree with psychology studies Gail is a nationally recognized certified trainer.
As the founder and executive director of the Make a Decision to Win Foundation, Gail offers support and coaching for those who desperately need to get their lives on track, but are not financially able. She, as an owner of 2 rescued Basset Hounds, Apollo and Winslow, will also donate her time and support to the Tri-State Basset Rescue Program.
Struggling her way to the top, today, multi-billion dollar companies, top CEOs, associations, Ivy League universities, and professional sports teams have adopted Gail’s ideas, leadership techniques and sales programs to increase performance and achievement the “Gail Kasper” way.
For more information please visit http://www.gailkasper.com. To arrange an interview or appearance with Gail Kasper, please contact Jeanette Kavanaugh 530-478-1685.
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