NewsLaugh Exclusive! Three Turban Monte: Bush and Rumsfeld Find Themselves Playing a Real Sucker's Game

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In this week's free issue, NewsLaugh.com, The Sanely Funny Weekly Humor Magazine, reports that George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld find themselves playing a real sucker's game, called Three Turban Monte. Of course, we all know the story of the rube who gets sucked into a game of Three-Card Monte on Fifth Avenue and watches his bets disappear into the pockets of the quick-handed sharpie at the folding card table. And what do we have in the Middle East now but a variation on the same woefully obvious sucker's game?

In this week's free issue, NewsLaugh.com, The Sanely Funny Weekly Humor Magazine, reports that George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld find themselves playing a real sucker's game, called Three Turban Monte.

Of course, we all know the story of the rube who gets sucked into a

game of Three-Card Monte on Fifth Avenue and watches his bets

disappear into the pockets of the quick-handed sharpie at the folding card table.

And what do we have in the Middle East now but a variation on the same woefully obvious sucker's game?

Can you pick the Medieval headgear under which we can hope to find a winner for America? Or are we bound to be snookered?

On one end we've got Muqtada al-Sadr's dark turban; on the other, Hassan Nasrallah's; and right smack in the middle, we find the turban of Iran's Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei.

Given the relative weakness of the civilian governments in the three countries and the ever-weakening power of the civil governments in bordering fundamentalist or fundamentalist-tending countries, how can we expect the game will to turn out?    

Even more consequentially, what are we still doing at the gaming table, hoping against hope to win what is, inevitably, a very real sucker's game?    

So what should we do?    

We need to see that our continued presence in Iraq is really based on our own skepticism about the determination of the Iraqi people to establish their own democratic, peaceful, and secure nation. And, terrible as the decision is, we must leave them to their own destiny.

We have freed the populace from a murderous tyrant, which was a great service.

It is now up to the Iraqis themselves, along with the citizens of the other nations in the region, to guess what is under those shifty black turbans and, having finally seen the disappointment that is actually there, to walk away from the loser's game on their own and finally join the family of peaceful and progressive nations.

Other sanely funny features in this week's free issue include:

  • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Questions Iran's Right To Exist
  • US Population Reaches 300 Million; Wow, That's A Lot Of Lovemaking!
  • After Election Debate, Emergency Medics Labor To Uncross Hillary Clinton's Fingers
  • The Invention Of Water And Air Creatures; Part Six Of The Invention Of Everything, An Eyewitness Account -- It's our Spoof of the Week!
  • The God Delusion By Richard Dawkins; Philosophical Fiddling While Rome Burns
  • New Microsoft Achievement: Making Norton And McAfee Feel Insecure

Readers may also subscribe to NewLaugh's free weekly newsletter for exclusive laughs and offers.

Each week, NewsLaugh.com presents humorous weekly articles under such headings as Sanely Funny Cover Story, Dreadline of the Week, Shreditorial, Washington Spin Din, Clever Monkey of the Week, and a Spoof of the Week.

About Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com:

Mr. Attea has had six shows produced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his comedy writing, "delightfully funny," "witty," with "great humor and ebullience" and "good, genuine laughs."

He was awarded a grant as a playwright by New York's Theater For The New City and co-wrote the first feature film Showtime produced.

He has extensive experience in news media. He wrote the recent campaign for The New York Sun, New York's new broadsheet newspaper, "Illuminate Your World," the classic campaign for Time Magazine, "There's never been a greater need for understanding," and the long-running theme for The Village Voice, "In this city, you need a Voice." In broadcast media, he wrote the advertising that successfully introduced Lifetime television, "There's nothing like a woman's Lifetime," and oversaw all the advertising for WABC TV and radio in New York.

The complete issue is available at http://www.newslaugh.com

For more information, email haha @ newslaugh.com

Tom Attea

Creator & Writer

Newslaugh.Com

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