And I will pay more for that ability
New York, NY (PRWEB) October 21, 2007
The most important life skills are not taught on college campuses, according to the late business great Dale Carnegie in his book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Though not taught on campuses, Fortune 500 companies have taught them for decades to their employees. Now, students seeking an insider's look need look no further. Apostolos Campus Ministry will be holding a seminar series on how to be a positive influence on the people around you.
According to Carnegie, the biggest problem people face is how to deal with other people. He discovered that more than anything people wanted training in the art of getting along with others in everyday business and social contacts.
Carnegie quoted John D. Rockefeller, who once said that the ability to deal with people is as purchasable a commodity as sugar or coffee. "And I will pay more for that ability," said Rockefeller, "than for any other under the sun."
The fundamental techniques for handling people include not to criticize, condemn, or complain, but to instead give people a feeling of importance and praise the good parts of them. According to Carnegie, the deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated, and people who can satisfy this deep-seated need are held in the highest regard.
There are those who would consider it a crime to let their families go hungry for six days, he states, but "they will let their families or employees go for six days and six weeks, and sometimes sixty years without giving them the heart appreciation that they crave almost as much as they crave food."
Making people like you is another topic of interest to many. The way to do this includes becoming genuinely interested in other people, smiling, speaking a person's name, being a good listener by encouraging others to talk about themselves, and to talk in terms of the other person's interest.
Carnegie illustrated this principle by saying some authorities declare that people may actually go insane to find a feeling of importance that they were unable to achieve in reality.
After understanding that people need to be appreciated and considered, you can go on to learn ways to win people to your way of thinking--by avoiding arguments, showing respect for opinions and never saying that they are wrong but always admit when you're wrong. When persuading others to your point of view, begin friendly, and start with questions that the other person will say yes to. Let the other person do the talking, and let the other person feel the idea is his/hers. Try to sympathize and see things honestly from the other person's perspective. Finally, dramatize your ideas, appeal to noble motives, and throw down a challenge.
Learn how to change people without offending them. Begin with praise and honest appreciation, talk about your own mistakes first, and then call attention to other people's mistakes indirectly. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders, and let the other person save face. Praise every improvement, and give them a good reputation to live up to. Encourage them by making their faults seem easy to correct, and make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.
For 94 years, business professionals have turned to Dale Carnegie's books, which are still ranked by many as the best of its kind. The age-old adage of "putting others first" is a necessity in order to exert a positive influence to those around you.
Apostolos Campus Ministry
Email: apostoloshq @ apostolos.org
# # #