Satire for the PEOPLE! "Outrageous Accusations and Damnable Lies" Available on CreateSpace and Amazon

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Bill Schmalfeldt's new book examines right wing "hate speech" and measures the angry words uttered by radio and TV meatheads against the actions taken by unbalanced individuals. Was the massacre in Tucson a "Second Amendment Solution" of the sort called for by Tea Party candidates in the 2010 election cycle?

"Outrageous Accusations and Damnable Lies" -- Satire for the PEOPLE!

I enjoy writing satire. Particularly political satire. Particularly political satire that perforates the smug attitude of the American Conservative mindset.

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Has all the conservative hate speech on the radio and Fox News led to the recent wave of right wing terror and the senseless attack against Rep. Gabrielle Giffords?

Would that be an Outrageous Accusation and Damnable Lie?

In his new book, "Outrageous Accusations and Damnable Lies", available through his website as well as through CreateSpace and Amazon) Author Bill Schmalfeldt examines the things conservatives say and compares their words to violent actions taken by unbalanced people. Was the attack on the Arkansas Congresswoman a "Second Amendment Solution" of the sort called for by Nevada Senatorial candidate Sharon Angle in the last election cycle?

In the preface to his book, the 56-year-old Elkridge, Md. man, who has been fighting Parkinson's disease for 11 years, says: "I enjoy writing. At this point in my progressive decline, it’s still something I can do fairly well. And I particularly enjoy writing satire. Particularly political satire. Particularly satire that perforates the smug attitude of the American Conservative mindset. I find fault with almost everyone! (Makes me a fun guy to hang out with!) The "religiofascist" and the assured atheist are just as likely to suffer under my keyboard. Anyone who thinks he or she knows ANYTHING for an absolute certainty and beyond questioning is a target. If you read an essay here that annoys or inflames you… good. Read the next essay. You might like that one. Or, at any rate, you’ll have something to think about."

On his web site, Schmalfeldt offers some excerpts from his new book.

From the essay, “It’s Not the Crosshairs, it’s the Constant Calls for Violence.” (p. 23)    

This sudden, vicious, deadly attack in Tucson — whether or NOT it was inspired by the right’s constant drone of paranoid fantasies about “taking back America” — it shines a light on the filthy kitchen floor that is the current state of right wing politics in America.    

And my, how the cockroaches SCATTER when the light comes on. (Hey, when I was younger I could only afford the rent for some really cheap apartments.)

From the essay, “The Right Wing Celebration of Dumb*ssery and the Danger it Presents to America” (p. 57)    

But then, last night as I was drifting off to sleep, part of what Limbaugh said popped into my consciousness.    

"…it was all the things the educated, ruling class wants their members to be and sound like…"    

Wait a minute, I thought… Did Crush Bimbo just slam the concept of “education”? Did he just put the hammer down on “educated people?”

From the essay “Sarah Palin® Wants to Trademark® her Name®” (pp. 113-114)    

Gosh, if I’m gonna keep writing satirical essays about idiots, dumb*sses, knuclkeheads and morons, I’d better find out where the ® key is on this thing. Sarah Palin wants to trademark her name! Not just hers, either. Bristol’s, too!

From the essay, “Are Tea Partiers Content to Ride the Short Bus with Michelle Bachmann?” (p. 131)    

You began waxing nostalgic about the early days of our union and the founding fathers…    

“It didn’t matter the color of their skin; it didn’t matter their language; it didn’t matter their economic status; it didn’t matter whether they descended from nobility or were of a higher class or a lower class. It made made no difference; once you got here we were all the same.”    

It didn’t matter one bit, Michelle! Even though the lighter skinned arrivals came over in relative luxury and of their own free will, whereas their darker brothers and sisters were captured in nets like animals, chained together below decks, laying in their own filth, to be sold at marketplaces on their arrival — like cattle.

From the essay, “Georgia Congressman Did NOT Evolve from Monkeys!” (p. 144)    

Intensive DNA analysis done at taxpayers’ expense has proven beyond a reasonable doubt that Kingston evolved from a different prehistoric creature entirely!

Yes. Congressman Jack Kingston’s DNA conclusively links him with the prehistoric trilobite — in this case, the Walliserops trifurcatus, a spiky, crawly thing that lived in the Middle Devonian period, about 390 million years ago.

From the essay, “Smug Atheism Bugs Me” (p. 202)    

These people remind me of the smart*ss third-grader who has just realized that Santa might actually be Mom and Dad, and decides to smugly proclaim his superiority to his classmates, ruining their fun and making them cry.    

Nobody is going door to door with guns forcing people to believe in any particular religion or any particular version of a religion. (I can’t see that happening until after 2012 when President Palin signs the ‘Religious Unity and Jesusification of America” law.)

From the essay, “The Deep Brain Manifesto” (p. 223)    

(T)hese same forces of stupidity are working overtime to ensure that health insurance companies continue to rake in windfall profits at the expense of stupid people who think that “gubbermint health care” is “socialist.”     Millionaires like Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity and Glenn Beck convince their viewers and listeners to embrace their fear, to hold onto it tight for it will keep them safe. (And poor, and sick, and uneducated and stupid, they neglect to add…)    

If we have a purpose in this life, it’s to love and be loved. And who we love and how we love is nobody’s business but our own. It is our mandate to learn as much as we can and to pass that knowledge on to the next generation so they may add to it and pass their combined knowledge on to another, hopefully more enlightened, generation.

This 236-page paperback, laced with hilarious illustrations, retails for $15.

His previous book, "Put On Your Parky Face" dealt with his 11-year (so far) struggle with Parkinson's disease. 100 percent of the proceeds of that book were donated to Parkinson's research charities.


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