Wives Ignored on Valentine's Day More Likely to Cheat

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Dr Bonnie warns couples that a recent survey shows women who are ignored on Valentine's Day are unhappy enough to look outside their marriage for an affair or validation. Ignoring the holiday that signifies romance for women can have dire consequences to a marriage.

Dr. Bonnie urges couples to heed her warning for the consequences of ignoring Valentine’s Day. According to AshleyMadison.com—the website dedicated to helping married individuals find partners to have affairs, the biggest day of the year for female signups is the day after Valentine’s Day (http://www.momlogic.com/2010/05/day_after_mothers_day_huge_signup_day_ashley_madison.php).

“It is imperative that men understand their partner’s needs for validation, especially during Valentine’s Day—the one day of the year dedicated for lovers to engage in romance and demonstrate their love for one another. A partner who deflects, ignores or devalues Valentine’s Day sends the message that he is dissatisfied or takes his lover for granted,” explains Dr. Bonnie.

“How an individual addresses Valentine’s Day is an indicator of the health of that relationship. Whether a partner plans an elaborate and romantic Valentine’s day, ignores the holiday, or makes a half-hearted attempt to remember their lover with a last minute token, shows where he places his wife on a list of his priorities,” explains Dr. Bonnie.

The Ashley Madison website, started in 2001 boasts 8,335,000 anonymous members of people in committed relationships and marriages looking for discrete affairs. Data from the site reports that women ignored or devalued during holiday’s they deem important— Valentine’s Day and Mother’s Day, become disillusioned with their relationship, and many seek attention from men outside their relationships immediately following these holidays.

According to Avvo, the largest website dedicated to rate and profile licensed lawyers and doctors says Americans seeking divorce skyrockets with a 40 percent increase in the number of requests for divorce lawyers around around Valentine's Day (http://www.cbs8.com/Global/story.asp?S=14004792).

"According to statistics, husbands forgetting or ignoring their spouse on Valentine's day might be the last straw," Dr. Bonnie warns.

“There is a greater and more positive payoff to being loving and generous instead of cynical on the one day a year dedicated to love. Gifts or gestures of love don’t have to be expensive to express gratitude and appreciation.”

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, author of Make Up Don’t Break Up with accompanying DVD Falling in Love and Staying In Love counsels couples considering breaking up, people who have committed adultery, and couples who want to strengthen their relationships damaged by resentment or unresolved anger. Dr. Bonnie teaches Smart Heart Dialogue along with communication and connection tools.

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil (Dr. Bonnie) is a relationship expert who was named by Psychology Today as one of America’s best therapists, and by New York Magazine as one of New York City’s best therapists. Known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of Adultery: The Forgivable Sin (adapted into a Lifetime movie starring actress Kate Jackson), Make Up Don’t Break Up, Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples), Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, Staying Not Straying, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity (Making Money Sexy).

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|Diane Dennis
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