Controlling Spouses Cause Resentment and Rebellion

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Imago Relationship International teaches couples how to have a healthy distribution of power. "A controlling spouse causes an imbalance of power in a relationship," warns Tim Atkinson, Imago International Executive Director, who adds that imbalances of power in relationships, governments, or communities invariably leads to an uprising. Imago International offers an educational Relationship Fitness Kit DVD and workbooks, which teaches couples how to move from conflict to connection.

As the world witnessed Egypt’s citizens uprising and protests against their autocratic governance under President Mubarak’s 30 year rule, Imago Relationship International reminds couples of the dangers of “intimate oppression.”

“When people feel oppressed and controlled, they rebel,” says Tim Atkinson, Imago International Executive Director, who adds that healthy relationships must be democratic.

“Our Imago relationship therapists teach couples to have a healthy distribution of power. If one partner in a relationship makes all key decisions and refuses to consider their partner’s input, their spouse becomes resentful. Once resentment and anger set in, repairing a relationship requires a skilled couples therapist. The key is for both partners to learn how to ask for what they want and need, and feel safe enough to discuss issues without feeling intimidated,” Atkinson explains.

Controlling behavior is one of the symptoms of emotional abuse (http://www.abusefacts.com/abuse/control.php.). Emotional abuse can lead to physical abuse and even violence. When groups of people or individuals in a relationship cannot make their own decisions and lose autonomy, they become victims. Invariably the victim will rebel or leave.

“The goal in Imago therapy is to teach couples how to maintain their individual internal power using Imago skills so they can keep their individuality while developing emotional intimacy within a relationship. When couples come to our therapists, there is often an imbalance of control,” says Atkinson who adds that sometimes individuals feel restricted by their partner because they have not learned skills to ask for what they need.

Imago dialogue teaches couples how to effectively ask for what they need without demanding, coercing, or manipulating. Both partners are taught how to engage in effective listening, and how to work together to solve conflict, which leads to meting the goal of an interpersonal relationship—emotional intimacy.

Couples should consider turning internal marital conflicts into opportunities for peaceful outcomes by learning Imago Dialogue techniques through Imago couples workshops, which are available in most cities. To find the nearest location visit: http://www.gettingtheloveyouwant.

To develop conflict resolution skills, Imago International is offering special on a Relationship Fitness Kit, “Through Conflict to Connection.” This documentary style DVD shows couples coached in the Imago processes. For $10 off the product enter coupon code connectnow at checkout. The Relationship Fitness Kit includes the Through Conflict to Connection DVD and two couples handbooks which helps couples practice the Imago technique. (Sale ends March 18, 2011)

Imago Relationships International helps couples restore connection. Weekend couples workshops are available worldwide. Imago has Certified over 2,000 couples therapists to guide couples through a process which was developed by co-founders Harville Hendrix, PhD and Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD. Imago first came to public attention through the New York Times best seller, "Getting the Love You Want". Oprah Winfrey dubbed Hendrix "The Marriage Whisperer". Calling him "Her favorite therapist" Oprah has invited him on her show 17 times. Couples can start learning how Imago creates a better relationship for free, by visiting http://www.GettingTheLoveYouWant.com and test-driving some online tools and learning experiences.

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|Diane Dennis
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