Tips for Tongue-Tied Teens: Dr. Bonnie Weighs In

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As families spend time together this week, many will likely notice the kids in the house gravitating toward electronic devices, staying away from full-blown conversations and even texting other friends or family in the same room. This phenomenon, recently discussed in USA Today (http://usat.ly/u1WDaD) is due to several things, says Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil.

As families spend time together this week, many will likely notice the kids in the house gravitating toward electronic devices, staying away from full-blown conversations and even texting other friends or family in the same room. This phenomenon, recently discussed in USA Today (http://usat.ly/u1WDaD) is due to several things, says Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil.

One of which has to do with the phase of life teens are going through. "People have to understand that when they live with a teenager, those teens are going to be narcissistic. It's part of the process of growing up," explains Dr. Bonnie. That's not an excuse, though, and she suggests taking a few moments to talk with teenagers about how to communicate with family that they might not see that often. "This is the time in life when they need to learn how to ask about other people, not just talk about themselves. They can find common interests with others and become comfortable talking about these topics," says Dr. Bonnie. Otherwise, teens run the risk of never growing out of this phase, and becoming narcissistic adults.

"Teach kids to answer with more than a 'yes' or 'no'," Dr. Bonnie advises. "They could tell a funny story or say something to compliment the other person." People who will be spending time around teens should also take some communication tips to heart. Find things to bridge the conversation gap - people should talk about things both they and the teen enjoy, which will help the teenager open up. When the adult leaves a family gathering, be sure to say something nice to the teen for them to remember you by!

Another reason Dr. Bonnie believes kids have a harder time communicating is that so much is done by text and email these days. "They're so used to technology they don't know how to talk to people in person. They have a hard time sitting down, looking people in the eye, and being personal." In these situations, Dr. Bonnie recommends teens unplug during family gatherings, at least for part of it: "They can still be kids, and spend time with the other kids, but try to do so in a way that is more sociable."

At the same time, keep in mind that teens don't like to be told what to do so making them feel like they have choices is important.

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Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil's best-selling book, Adultery the Forgivable Sin is being re-released under a new distributor and making its appearance available in eBook format and print on Amazon.com (http://www.amazon.com/Adultery-Forgivable-Bonnie-Eaker-Weil/dp/1587768151/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1321019076&sr=8-1). Adultery the Forgivable Sin was also made into a Lifetime Original Movie starring Kate Jackson.

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, is also author of the 2010 New York Times Reader’s Choice Award-winning book Make Up Don’t Break Up with accompanying DVD Falling in Love and Staying In Love. Dr. Bonnie counsels couples, singles, and step families. She works with those considering breaking up, people who have committed adultery, and couples who want to strengthen their relationships damaged by resentment or unresolved anger, teaching people to “fight” to increase passion, bring back magic and restore the sizzle. Dr. Bonnie teaches Smart Heart Dialogue along with communication and connection tools, and counsel’s families and children.

Named the Best Local Therapist by the US Commerce Association and known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of other books like Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples), Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity.

Dr. Bonnie is presently featured and available now on the Discovery Health/Oprah Winfrey Network documentary titled "Unfaithful" and A&E on addictions. ABC’s Good Morning America, a three-day series on NBC’s The Today Show, The Oprah Winfrey Show five times, a four day series on Fox TV regarding dating. She appears frequently on ABC, Fox, CBS and NBC News, The View, 20/20, and CNN. Visit Dr. Bonnie at http://www.DoctorBonnie.com.

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