Couples who Lie about Money are Committing Financial Infidelity

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Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, author of Financial Infidelity (Making Money Sexy), warns couples that gambling can turn into financial infidelity where couples "cheat' on one another by lying about spending. Many couples have ended up in financial ruin before a partner finds out. Dr. Bonnie urges couples to engage in Smart Heart Dialogue, and heed the warning signs of this bio-chemical craving for connection. "Gambling addiction is a self medicating, stress busting and thrill seeking high, just like all other addictions," warns Weil.

As the Kentucky Derby, a national tradition, rolls around with all its rituals and regalia Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, author of Financial Infidelity (Making Money Sexy), reminds couples of the warning signs of gambling addictions.

“The Kentucky Derby is a richly traditional event. However people, wherever they are, can get sucked into virtual betting online—another accessible outlet for people addicted to gambling,” warns Dr. Bonnie who adds that she has had many clients who kept their gambling habit a secret until they had taken their family down a path of financial ruin. Dr. Bonnie calls cheating with money financial infidelity. Financial infidelity is another form of cheating, and can be so subtle one doesn’t know they are doing it. Weil considers this addiction as well as others a “self medicating, stress busting, thrill seeking high—like a love drug.”

“Gambling, like all addictions is a bio-chemical craving for connection. When needs aren’t being met, people turn to a quick fix—an activity that gives immediate, but temporary satisfaction or thrill. Unfortunately many of these quick fixes easily turn into compulsive behavior. Once the high wears off from the purchase or behavior, people repeat it until they are in a full- blown addiction. Illicit sex, shopping, and gambling are easier than ever to engage in as all are available at the click of the keyboard from a personal computer.

“When a cycle of financial betrayals become entrenched, It is often just a matter of time before other areas of the relationship are damaged as trust is eroded, communication compromised, and emotional disconnection takes place,” explains Dr. Bonnie.

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, relationship therapist, and winner of the NY Times Reader’s Choice Award for best dating book 2010 for Make Up Don’t Break Up reminds couples of the warning sings that their partner might be committing financial infidelity.

“If your credit cards are maxed out, unexplained bank balance transfers or stock and bond selling occurs, there is a good chance a partner is engaged in unhealthy spending,” says Dr. Bonnie.

Dr. Bonnie recommends couples participate in Smart Heart Dialogue (a communication technique originated by Dr. Bonnie and found in her books) to begin the process of reconnecting and meeting each other’s emotional needs so that the addictions, compulsions, or acting out will be replaced with fulfilling the need for emotionally intimate connection.

For interview contact Diane Dennis, Inspired Media at 503-678-1356.

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil (Dr. Bonnie) is a relationship expert who was named by Psychology Today as one of America’s best therapists, and by New York Magazine as one of New York City’s best therapists. Known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of Adultery: The Forgivable Sin (adapted into a Lifetime movie starring actress Kate Jackson), Make Up Don’t Break Up, Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples) and winner of the NY Times Reader’s Choice award for best dating book 2010, Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, Staying Not Straying, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity (Making Money Sexy).

Dr. Bonnie has appeared on ABC’s Good Morning America, a three-day series on NBC’s The Today Show, The Oprah Winfrey Show five times, a four day series on Fox TV regarding dating, Discovery Health documentary "Infidelity" and A&E on addictions. She appears frequently on ABC, Fox, CBS and NBC News, The View, 20/20, and CNN. Visit Dr. Bonnie at http://www.DoctorBonnie.com.

Dr. Bonnie has appeared on ABC’s Good Morning America, a three-day series on NBC’s The Today Show, The Oprah Winfrey Show five times, a four day series on Fox TV regarding dating, Discovery Health documentary "Infidelity" and A&E on addictions. She appears frequently on ABC, Fox, CBS and NBC News, The View, 20/20, and CNN. Visit Dr. Bonnie at http://www.DoctorBonnie.com.

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, author of the NY Times Reader’s Choice Award winning book Make Up Don’t Break Up with accompanying DVD Falling in Love and Staying In Love counsels couples considering breaking up, people who have committed adultery, and couples who want to strengthen their relationships damaged by resentment or unresolved anger, teaching people to “fight” to increase passion, bring back magic and restore the sizzle. Dr. Bonnie teaches Smart Heart Dialogue along with communication and connection tools, and counsels families and children.

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|Diane Dennis
Inspired Media Communication
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