Cost of divorce is more traumatic than adapting to single life says Adults.co.uk

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The cost of a divorce is the second most traumatic part of a marriage break-up according to a new survey by adults.co.uk.

Members of the website, aimed specifically at single people who have gone through a serious break-up, were asked to rate which elements of their divorce they found hardest to deal with. Emotional turmoil was unsurprisingly the top toil. But researchers were surprised to find that financial impact was the second biggest difficulty, rated higher even than concerns over childcare.

The next most challenging consequence of divorce was guilt and concern over children’s welfare. This was followed in fourth place by concerns over changes in lifestyle, such as where to live. Trauma number five was how to meet a new partner, suggesting that many members had joined divorced.adults.co.uk are already making active and successful steps to heal from a big split.

Other, ‘personal and private’ concerns came out as the sixth most burdensome aspect of divorce. And right at the bottom of the worry-list was pride and ‘what other people may think’ about their new divorced status.

Around 750 members of divorced.adults.co.uk, the divorced platform of dating site, adults.co.uk were quizzed online. They were asked to rank the above seven aspects of divorce in order of which they found to be personally most challenging. Researchers added up the rankings, giving seven points to each time something was rated as most stressful, and one point when it was voted least stressful.

The average cost of a divorce in the British courts is £13,000 and there are around 120,000 divorces every year according to the office of national statistics(http://www.guardian.co.uk/news/datablog/2010/jan/28/divorce-rates-marriage-ons). While most divorcees may be aware of the emotional implications ahead of divorce, the results of the poll suggest that most people give less consideration to the ignorance of the financial implications.

Suzy Miller who runs a divorce support group and has written a divorce survival guide says: “Divorce is not just about ending a legal contract - it's about emotional pain, fear and guilt and financial loss. Lots of people think of some of these aspects but not all. I encourage people to get their heads and hearts in the right place before they embark on the financial and legal aspects of divorce. If not you might have years of anger ahead, which can affect on children and future relationships.”

Divorced.adults.co.uk is one of the popular dating platforms on the dating site adults.co.uk, which has more than 1,500,000 UK members. It was started after demand by divorced daters who wanted a site where they could ease themselves back onto the dating scene with people who may be equally cautious and nervous about starting over with a new partner.

Founder of the site Paul King said: “Dating after divorce is often a difficult thing to do for an individual, after being with the same person for so long. While you don’t necessarily have to date another divorcee, it can be a positive start to have that in common. Having been married, you now know what you want or don’t want in a new partner. Meeting new people is definitely healthy but this site allows members to ease themselves in slowly with other understanding potential partners.”

Adults.co.uk has 1,500,000 members and enables members to choose which platform they want to join. It is made up of Cuddly Adults, Mature Adults, Divorced Adults, Single Parent Adults, Christian Adults or the more generic Single Adults.

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Paul King
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