Valdosta, Ga. (PRWEB) September 19, 2006
Most men would say that their wife or their girlfriend is their priority. Mark Webb, a licensed marriage and family therapist, believes most men are only paying that priority lip service. A man needs to make his woman his priority. When she is and she knows it, she will move heaven and earth for her man. His needs will be met tenfold.
This is just one of the observations, lessons, and experiences shared in Webb's recently published book, "How To Be A Great Partner: A Revolutionary and Rapid Program for Building a Great Relationship."
Regular followers of Webb's monthly column in Valdosta Scene magazine or his articles on the internet will find the same clear, concise, matter-of-fact approach in his book.
Webb bases his book on over 20 years of helping individuals and couples with relationship challenges. "This isn't just a book for relationships in crisis but for couples looking to improve their relationship." Webb says. The book spells out how a couple can turn a relationship in a downward spiral around or how to make an already good relationship into one that is a great relationship.
In sharing experiences from his practice, Webb doesn't use real names but readers will likely see some aspect of themselves or their relationships in some of the people and incidents described. There is the wife that announces, "No man is going to tell me what to do." There is the husband who puts hunting, fishing and his buddies before his wife. There is the wife who spends more time with her parents than her husband. There is the husband who refuses to take part in giving the relationship direction.
Readers may also realize before finishing this book that there are small things they can do to strengthen their relationships, and larger ones as well.
Webb says it is all about sacrifice. Both sides must be willing to sacrifice to make a relationship great. He notes that often even if only one member of the relationship is willing to initially sacrifice, it leads to the other reciprocating.
He uses the example of the man who rises on a Saturday morning, ready to do his chores. He's almost out the door when his wife wants to talk. She only wants 10 to 15 minutes. The husband who refuses to give her that small amount of time and listen to her will likely be shut out by his wife for the rest of the day and the weekend will be ruined for the couple. The husband who stops and listens will likely have a much better day and a good weekend all because he spent 10 to 15 minutes listening to his wife.
Though this book is for both men and women, Webb says he considered writing a book solely for men. He addresses how men need to step up and lead in a relationship. He lays out a simple, easy to follow formula that promotes success. "I train men how to not only hit the target but to hit the bull's-eye consistently." Webb writes. He is excellent at teaching men how to understand the needs of their woman and vice versa.
Webb encourages various methods to strengthen a relationship. One such method is The 80/20 Rule. In the early years of a marriage, many couples get derailed by focusing too much on the things they dislike about their partner. Often, Webb explains, the likes still far outweigh the dislikes, but those dislikes become the focal point. By focusing on the dislikes, the dislikes magnify to such a degree that it is easy to forget what you ever saw in your partner anyway. Webb writes that a person should focus on the 80 percent or better, instead of placing so much attention on the 20 percent or less they don't like.
"If you made an 85 percent on a test, you would be thrilled that you did so well," Webb says "So, why not apply that same standard to a relationship."
Mark Webb is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice at South Georgia Psychiatric and Counseling Center in Valdosta, Georgia. He is the author of How To Be A Great Partner and is a widely sought speaker on topics from relationship enhancement to self improvement. He has a great marriage to his wife, Dorraine. They have 3 teenagers. To purchase this book, http://www.HowToBeAGreatPartner.com For free articles or to contact Mark Webb go to http://www.TheRelationshipSpecialist.com .