It takes most people a while to realize they are in a relationship that is eroding their self-esteem...it can be easy to miss the warning signs until you are deeply involved and fast becoming the target of more overt kinds of abuse.
Beverly Hills, California (PRWEB) October 28, 2014
Beverly Hills licensed Clinical Psychologist and nationally recognized relationship expert, Dr. Kathleen Mojas is celebrating 20 years of private practice in her Beverly Hills office where she has assisted hundreds of people to achieve greater joy and fulfillment in their relationships. Dr. Mojas has released an important list of warning signs and suggestions for anyone who suspects they are in a toxic relationship.
Dr. Mojas explains: “Believe it or not, it’s not always easy to know when you are in a toxic relationship. It takes most people a while to realize they are in a relationship that is slowly eroding their self-esteem, friendships and all the things that make them happy. The lingering glow of the falling in love stage and the foggy goggles that allowed you to initially see your partner as the perfect person are still creating blind spots for you. Unfortunately, that means that for most of us it can be easy to miss the warning signs until you are deeply involved and fast becoming the target of more overt kinds of abuse.”
Dr. Mojas has identified that her patients in toxic relationships are with a person who relies on manipulation and control tactics. Dr. Mojas notes that they aren’t interested in in a mutually respectful and reciprocal relationship. They want control and power. As the relationship continues you are likely to feel more and more confused, anxious, depressed and even physically ill.
If you suspect you are in a toxic relationship Dr. Mojas suggests the following:
1) The first step to regaining your sanity is to become aware of their tactics. When you can observe rather than absorb their toxic tactics you will be on the road toward separating and regaining a foothold on the person you are and your separate perceptions and opinions.
2) Get some perspective and support. Ask friends and family to tell you what they have observed about your relationship.
3) Don’t minimize or downplay your feelings of concern or discomfort.
4) Speak up and appropriately assert yourself when boundaries are crossed and you are treated poorly.
5) Take an honest inventory of your own tendency to justify, minimize or believe you can change or rescue someone who engages in any of the above behaviors.
6) Ask yourself if you are accepting treatment in the relationship that you would never sign up for when first meeting someone?
7) If you are unable to speak up or leave the relationship, it is time to seek professional help. Therapy can turn a confusing and painful situation into an empowering, healing experience that allows you to learn, and grow stronger and wiser.
Dr. Kathleen Mojas is trained in a variety of cutting edge techniques to facilitate healthy relationships and help people overcome relationship sabotaging patterns. The foundation of Dr. Mojas’ approach is based on the importance of how our early relationships develop a blueprint for intimacy in our adult relationships as well as for our ability to cope with all types of stress throughout our lifespan. Find out more about toxic relationships and how to recover by visiting drkathleenmojas.com.