It’s An Emotional IQ Kind of Christmas: New Study Reveals Five Key Traits To Develop This Holiday Season

Share Article

A new study by and offers insight into personality traits that can help people get through this holiday season in a happy and harmonious way.

Self-awareness, resilience, and flexibility are key emotional IQ traits that will come in handy this holiday season.

Developing certain EIQ competencies can help people navigate the holiday season smoothly and harmoniously.

The holidays are generally a joyful time, but it can also turn into a free-for-all where people hash out their differences.

With a controversial election that has lead to a stern division in opinion never seen before, lines in the sand have been drawn not only among each party’s supporters, but also between neighbors, friends, and families. This could lead to potentially unpleasant discussions around the dinner table this holiday season, aided and abetted, perhaps, by one too many cups of eggnog. Researchers at Queendom suggest a few traits that can come in handy this season and potentially reduce emotional indigestion.

Analyzing data from 4,092 people who took their Emotional Intelligence Test, researchers compared two distinct groups: Those who are happy with their interpersonal relationships and those who are not. Queendom’s study reveals that developing five key traits can improve the quality of human interaction and encourage kinship, particularly during difficult times.

(Note: Scores range on a scale from 0 to 100)


  •     Score for people who are content with their relationships: 72
  •     Score for people who are discontent: 47

Content people go into every situation with a hopeful and optimistic outlook. Even when times are challenging, they look for the silver lining, and see every hardship as an opportunity to learn and grow. They try to find the best in others, even if they don’t entirely see eye-to-eye with a person.

How it can help during the holidays: Rather than going into the holidays with a defeatist attitude, see it as an opportunity to make changes for the better, mend bridges, and start with a clean slate.


  •     Score for people who are content with their relationships: 72
  •     Score for people who are discontent: 50

Content people recognize their value, and go into relationships believing that they deserve just as much love and respect as the other person. High self-esteem acts like a protective barrier, where no insult, disparaging remark or failure can penetrate and damage the bearer’s sense of self-worth. People with low self-esteem, on the other hand, are more likely to be deeply affected by negative comments – and may even put down others in order to boost their own fragile sense of self. Those with high self-esteem accept themselves, quirks and all, because they know they are special.

How it can help during the holidays: Whether it’s a dig against your cooking, outfit or job/relationship status, don’t allow other people’s opinion of you shape yours. Look beyond the medium to find the message: Behind many perceived insults from family and friends is a concern and the desire to offer advice, even if poorly worded. And keep in mind that sometimes, people will bring you down in order to feel better about their own shortcomings.


  •     Score for people who are content with their relationships: 77
  •     Score for people who are discontent: 58

Content people have developed a strength of character that allows them to see and approach hardship in a unique way. They interpret obstacles, failures, and difficulties as a test of skill rather than as an impassable roadblock. Even if faced with a circumstance that they will have to deal with for the rest of their life (e.g. illness, loss), they use adversity to make them stronger. This inner strength allows them to empathize with the hardships of others, and potentially guide those who are also struggling.

How it can help during the holidays: As you ponder the year that has passed, don’t view your failures as endings, but rather, as an opportunity to do things better in the time to come. The most impactful lessons are those that are learned the hard way.


  •     Score for people who are content with their relationships: 70
  •     Score for people who are discontent: 53

Content people make it a point to tune into their emotions. Rather than just scratching the surface, they strive to understand why a situation or person causes them to react in a certain way. They understand that feelings are more than just a response: Feelings offer a message that allows them to better understand their wants and desires, and the motive behind their actions.

How it can help during the holidays: Your feelings are your responsibility and are under your control. A person cannot make you angry…you allow yourself to react this way. If someone says something to upset you, take a step back and try to gain perspective of the situation. Why have this person’s words affected you so much? Perhaps they bother you because they are touching on a truth you are not ready to admit to yourself, or they remind you of a difficult time. Understanding where your reaction comes from is the first step toward better self-awareness.


  •     Score for people who are content with their relationships: 74
  •     Score for people who are discontent: 64

Content people do not see the world in black and white. There is room for diverse opinions and different interpretations of facts or the truth. While they may not agree with other people’s perspectives, content people recognize that everyone has a right to their opinion. They are open to different ideas and views, if only to gain a broader understanding of an issue.

How it can help during the holidays: Before judging a person’s opinion or choice as right or wrong, take a step back to consider the situation from their perspective. Try to understand what would motivate a person to choose a certain path. What a person values, desires, and fears can play a role in the decisions they make and actions they take.

“The holidays are generally a joyful time, but it can also turn into a free-for-all where people hash out their differences and let their emotions loose - and the free-flowing booze can strike down their typical inhibitions, if they have any in the first place. It can put a real damper on holiday dinners,” explains Dr. Jerabek, president of PsychTests, the parent company of Queendom. “This can lead many people to dread the holiday season and the get-togethers that come with it. However, rather than worrying about other people’s conduct, focus on monitoring your own. Their behavior should not dictate your actions or how joyful your holidays will be – it’s your reaction that does. This is why emotional intelligence has been linked to professional success as well as happy relationships: The onus is placed on the individual to learn how to deal with emotional situations and people by developing the traits and skills that will allow them to navigate through challenging circumstances, and complex social interactions.”

Want to assess your emotional IQ? Check out

Professional users of this test can see a sample of the Multidimensional Emotional Intelligence Quotient report: MEIQ - HR (Multidimensional Emotional Intelligence Quotient)

Request a free demo of this test and any other assessments from ARCH Profile’s extensive battery:

To learn more about psychological testing, download this free eBook: Spotting Diamonds in the Rough. (

About is a subsidiary of PsychTests AIM Inc. is a site that creates an interactive venue for self-exploration with a healthy dose of fun. The site offers a full range of professional-quality, scientifically validated psychological assessments that empower people to grow and reach their real potential through insightful feedback and detailed, custom-tailored analysis.

About PsychTests AIM Inc.
PsychTests AIM Inc. originally appeared on the internet scene in 1996. Since its inception, it has become a pre-eminent provider of psychological assessment products and services to human resource personnel, therapists, academics, researchers and a host of other professionals around the world. PsychTests AIM Inc. staff is comprised of a dedicated team of psychologists, test developers, researchers, statisticians, writers, and artificial intelligence experts (see The company’s research division, Plumeus Inc., is supported in part by Research and Development Tax Credit awarded by Industry Canada.

Share article on social media or email:

View article via:

Pdf Print

Contact Author

Ilona Jerabek
PsychTests AIM Inc.
+1 514-745-3189 Ext: 112
Email >
since: 10/2012
Follow >
since: 10/2009
Like >
Follow us on
Visit website