Author David Alan Cohen Unveils a Hilarious Tale of Adventure, Adultery and Treachery in New Book

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"If It Flies, Floats, or Flirts...turn the page" chronicles the lives of wealthy and mischievous individuals who were tempted to follow this lifestyle and ultimately face the consequences of their decision.

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"If It Flies, Floats, or Flirts...turn the page" by David Alan Cohen is a humorous and engaging account of dysfunctional and bored wealthy males who subscribe to this lifestyle and the potential repercussions that ensue as shared by the author who has been an employee and confidant to these participants for decades.

The flies, floats and flirts lifestyle of Harp, who prefers to rent women with his famous tagline of ‘how much, how long, and when do we get started’ is compared to that of Herschel, a wealthy industrialist from the Great White North. They fly their own seaplanes, are married with children and grandchildren and addicted to male erectile dysfunction medicine.    

Herschel seeks women for companionship, be it for weeks, months, or years, introducing all of them as the current ‘girlfriend’ to his male friends much to the chagrin of his suspicious and ill wife Sadie, who knows he is doing this but can’t prove it. Throughout the course of the story, Harp cuts to the chase for sex while Herschel entertains the women in his fleet of aircraft, hoping to score with the multi-mile high club in his jet and savor a victory at sea in the seaplane. His family fears for their inheritance with each new ‘girlfriend’ he acquires.

Cohen has worked for other wealthy males who fly their own aircraft but can only flirt with women. Acting as tough, alpha males within their own peer group, they are spineless at the thought of losing their fortunes should they ever get caught in any affair. Insanely jealous of Harp and Herschel, they lavish exorbitant sums of money on their aircraft and boats who have become their mistresses.

If It Flies, Floats, or Flirts...turn the page demonstrates that excess time and money leads to mischief and wandering minds turn to the thought of having an affair. This book is a highly interesting volume that reveals money and material possessions cannot always provide happiness and not all that glitters is gold.

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About the Author

David Alan Cohen has observed and humorously recorded the behavioral eccentricities of his very wealthy friends and clients in private and corporate aviation since 1986. Cohen is a licensed FAA maintenance technician and inspector and rated to fly multiple corporate jet aircraft. As a nautical enthusiast, both a wooden sailboat and performance boat have been meticulously restored and enjoyed by Cohen. With regard to this title, he has not actively engaged in flirtatious behavior during this time as his clients and friends have permitted him to live vicariously through their own exploits and mishaps.

If It Flies, Floats, or Flirts...turn the page by David Alan Cohen
Publication Date: August 31, 2013
Trade Paperback; $19.99; 258 pages; 978-1-4836-2726-7
Trade Hardback; $29.99; 258 pages; 978-1-4836-2727-4
eBook; $3.99; 978-1-4836-2728-1

Members of the media who wish to review this book may request a complimentary paperback copy by contacting the publisher at (888) 795-4274 x. 7879. To purchase copies of the book for resale, please fax Xlibris at (812) 355-4079 or call (888) 795-4274 x. 7879.

For more information on self-publishing or marketing with Xlibris, visit To receive a free publishing guide, please call (888) 795-4274.

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