Child Psychologist Advocates Parents Prioritize 3 Self-Awareness Steps to Help Boost a Child's Social and Emotional Development
Based on working with children, families and teachers for over 20 years, Child Psychologist Mona Delahooke advocates that parents be more self-aware of how their emotions can directly impact a child's sense of relational safety and stress. Using a calm and compassionate approach to behavioral challenges can boost a child's social and emotional development.
LOS ANGELES, May 8, 2019 /PRNewswire-PRWeb/ -- As a mother and Child Psychologist, Dr. Mona Delahooke encourages moms and dads to prioritize three self-awareness steps that can reduce everyone's stress and challenging behaviors discussed in her new book, "Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children's Behavioral Challenges" (PESI, March 19, 2019). In sync with Mother's Day (May 12, 2019) and Father's Day (June 16, 2019), Delahooke reminds parents of the importance of self-care and creating a relationally safe environment so children feel more secure, loved and confident.
Delahooke emphasizes, "One of the hardest parts of parenting is getting the discipline right. Parents often receive mixed messages about their child's behaviors, causing more anxiety, and increasing self-blame. We can help mothers and fathers deflect the blame they may feel by understanding that brain science shows that compassion and an understanding of each child's reactions to stress is the best path for helping children with challenges. By staying calm, flexible, and listening to a child's concerns, parents can help increase their son or daughter's social and emotional development."
Because 90% of parents feel judged "most of the time", according to the National Parent Survey Overview and Key Insights, ZERO TO THREE (June 2016), it makes dealing with challenging behaviors even harder. And in Dr. Delahooke's opinion, "If you ask parents of children with behavioral challenges, the number would be closer to 100%."
In "Beyond Behaviors", Dr. Delahooke explains how a mother, father or caregiver's emotional regulation sets the foundation for solving behavioral challenges and boosting the self-esteem of children. To reduce the stress levels at home and improve parent-child relationships, here are three self-awareness steps Delahooke recommends:
1. Take Self-Compassion Breaks to Reduce Your own Stress: The research on mindfulness and self-compassion breaks for as little as minutes a day shows that it can make a huge difference. Each mom and dad should make their self-care a priority, which may include taking walks, yoga, exercise, artistic endeavors, or whatever helps them recharge.
2. Be Aware of Your Emotional Tone Around Children – It's important for moms and dads to understand that children "take in" an adult's emotions, affecting the child. Delahooke explains, "Our own emotional tone helps calm our child's fight or flight response, which is the cause of the most severe behavioral challenges." Talking in a calm tone at eye level can help a child feel understood and safe.
3. Identify Ways to Make Your Child Feel Emotionally Safe – It's important for moms and dads to recognize that human beings have a basic need to feel safe. If a child senses stress in relationships or the environment, they are more likely to have challenging behaviors. To help a child feel safe, Dr. Delahooke advises, "Prioritize messages of love and acceptance, over behavior charts, stickers or other rewards/consequences. We feel safe by being with each other and experiencing joyful connections."
In "Beyond Behaviors" Chapter 4: "Safety is the Starting Point", Dr. Delahooke emphasizes, "When a child feels safe with a trusted adult, their social engagement behaviors will happen naturally." Topics covered include case study examples and tips for understanding a child's challenging behaviors:
- The behavior is usually just the tip of the iceberg, and we need to look beneath the surface at the potential causes.
- Too often we assume a child is intentionally misbehaving, when in fact they are often acting on their survival instincts.
- How to stay calm as an adult to make the child feel safe.
- What to say to make the child feel safe, loved and secure.
- Physical expressions that can help the child feel safe (tone of voice, facial expressions, body gestures).
If parents increase self-awareness and create an environment with "emotional warmth", Delahooke believes anxiety levels can be significantly reduced for mothers, fathers, caregivers and children – leaving more room for joy at home, school or play.
NEW BOOK
"Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children's Behavioral Challenges" (March 19, 2019)
https://www.amazon.com/Beyond-Behaviors-Compassion-Understand-Behavioral/dp/1683731190/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=beyond+behaviors&qid=1552498765&s=gateway&sr=8-1
MEDIA CONTACT
Liz Kelly, 310-987-7207
ABOUT
Mona M. Delahooke, Ph.D. (Los Angeles, CA) is a pediatric psychologist, keynote speaker and Author ("Beyond Behaviors", Number 1 Amazon Bestseller in Developmental Psychology books) with 30 years of experience specializing in supporting children and families. Dr. Delahooke is a senior faculty member of the Profectum Foundation, an organization dedicated to supporting families of neurodivergent children, adolescents and adults, along with being a trainer for the Los Angeles County Department of Mental Health. Dr. Delahooke's first book, "Social and Emotional Development in Early Intervention: A Skills Guide for Working with Children" (February 2017), describes a contemporary, neurodevelopmental approach useful for all childhood professionals. Dr. Delahooke's work has been seen on KTLA, Psychology Today, Dr. Drew Midday Live with Leeann Tweeden and the Atlanta Journal Constitution. https://monadelahooke.com
SOURCE Mona Delahooke
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