The Most Expensive Press Release Ever Written...Or Not

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Seasoned PR Professional Mitch Delaplane Distributes Press Release as A Non-Fungible Token, Patiently Waits for Bidding War to Begin

“Why did it take me ten years to outdo my previous press release,” ponders Delaplane as he looks off into the distance a little grayer in a wool cardigan, sipping herbal tea. “I guess I was just waiting for the technology to catch up.”

On the heels of his 10-year-old viral press release (“The Most Amazing Press Release Ever Written”) seasoned PR veteran Mitch Delaplane has done it again. This time, in the form of a non-fungible token (NFT), yes, a one-of-a-kind digital press release he hopes will outperform all previous press release distributions since word of the moon landing crossed newswires in 1969.

“Why did it take me ten years to outdo my previous press release,” ponders Delaplane as he looks off into the distance a little grayer in a wool cardigan, sipping herbal tea. “I guess I was just waiting for the technology to catch up.”

While the NFT craze has made millionaires out of digital artists and sports fans alike, Delaplane feels the press release genre is an untapped market. The standard public relations tactic for delivering company news and brand announcements has fallen out of favor with the rise of social media; however, making one an NFT - before the NFT bubble bursts - could reinvigorate news release distribution while sending this incredibly unique document into a bidding war that results in it becoming the most expensive press release ever written (or not). While GIFs of slam dunks are a dime a dozen, owning 475 words of pure genius is something you can brag about for decades as you dangle your crypto wallet in front of the faces of all those who underbid you.

“A lot of people will say this isn’t news, but several national outlets recently covered the President’s dog defecating in the White House, so, it’s all relative,” adds a confident Delaplane. “Regardless, this groundbreaking press release is available on OpenSea and poised to make history. Or not. Either way, it’s putting some fun in non-FUNgible and that’s all that matters.”

Who would want to own a one-of-a-kind, digitally authenticated press release you may ask? Perhaps an eccentric billionaire looking to decorate a single-family home on Mars…or a major news outlet looking to spice up its lobby…a modern museum in France…or a titan of blockchain antiquities. The list is endless, and it’s a list Delaplane hopes is full of cold hard cash (or several Bitcoins).

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Mitch D Delaplane
mitchdelaplane@me.com
+1 (773) 991-6509
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