Tip Sheet: How to Deal with Anger Before, During, and After the Divorce
(PRWEB) April 07, 2014 -- Online divorce service MyDivorcePapers.com (MDP) works with couples seeking to avoid trial divorce. As a result, they utilize this do-it-yourself service, but still find a number of issues that cause anger and conflict. To aid these applicants on the emotional side, the company has put together a new tip sheet for how to handle anger before, during, and after the divorce. This is what MDP recommends.
Before The Divorce: Set A Business Tone.
Before one gets to the filing of divorce papers, it’s absolutely essential, the company states, to set the tone “that this is a business transaction and not a matter of the heart.”
The MDP representative explains: “If you’re both wanting the same thing — to get through this process doing as little damage to each other as possible — then you’ve got to stop looking at it as the end of a relationship. That mindset makes it too easy to succumb to the emotional side, and lose sight of the goal. You may be angry at your spouse, but keep reminding yourself that the goal is freedom, not another fight.”
During The Divorce: Realize That All Divorce, Collaborative Or Conflicted, Is A Give-And-Take.
When a person resolves to file for divorce, particularly if they are angry at their spouse, this can lead to what the company calls “a vicious cycle of revenge.”
“Your anger may be inadvertently pushing you to seek vengeance on your spouse. While that may be tempting, it’s probably not what the long-term-you really wants. What you want is to escape a bad situation and move on to a better one. You don’t get there by heaping the payback on your spouse. For starters, the system of divorce in this country is engineered to be equitable to both parties. That means you may want to take 100 percent of the marital estate, but the law simply won’t allow it. In other words, you’ll have to give some to get some, and if you’re busy seeking revenge, then you’re getting in the way of reaching that equitable solution that’ll allow you to move on with life.”
Finally, After The Divorce: Create Distance Between You And Your Spouse.
MDP realizes that it may not always be possible to remove an ex from your life completely — particularly when kids are present — but it should still be a goal to create distance so that the past isn’t constantly coming back to haunt the present. “If you don’t have kids or something else legally binding you to each others’ lives, then the solution is simple: stop talking to one another and consciously or unconsciously including the ex in your current life,” a rep stated. “If you do have kids, it’s a bit more complicated, but you can ensure a healthy distance is maintained by making your child the focal point of your attention. This goes back to before the divorce. You’ve got to deal with your ex in a businesslike manner and not get too personal.”
MyDivorcePapers.com provides affordable divorce forms solutions for those looking to file for divorce. Paperwork can be completed and compiled in 45 minutes for immediate use.
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MyDivorcePapers.com
92 Argonaut, Suite 200
Aliso Viejo, CA 92656
604-2860
Jason McClain, McClain Concepts, http://www.mcclainconcepts.com/, +1 (949) 630-0380, [email protected]
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